Over the years, I also carried silently in my heart another dream: to collaborate with our sisters in the missions. I knew for a fact that places we cannot reach personally can be reached through the instruments of communication.
The fifth daughter of Celeste and Sabino Duarte, I was born on 18 June 1949 in a littletown on the slopes of the Monchique Hills, a very beautiful corner of Portugal. Our family was a big one–seven children, plus many cousins living in the same area. Numerous though we were, my father often said that no child of his would ever lack love and this was true. In fact, our family atmosphere was saturated with affection. Mealtimes were always festive occasions for us. Even though Dad barely knew how to read, he was a born leader and he distributed the family work load very fairly among us.
I attended school only up until the fourth grade because at that time very few children from the rural areas were able to continue their education beyond the elementary level. We were a farm family and life was hard. With great effort, we managed to eke out a bare existence from the land.
The atmosphere at home was rich in faith. My whole family prayed together, especially the rosary, which we recited every day. At the age of seven, I began to attend catechism classes in the parish and I also participated in the Catholic Action movement.
When I was a teenager one of the coordinators of our local CA group said that a girl had to start praying to the Lord 20 years in advance to obtain the grace of having one of her sons become a priest. Since I was already dreaming of getting married one day, I immediately began to pray for that intention. It never entered my head that God might want me for himself!
It wasn’t easy for me to understand and accept the Lord’s call to the religious life. During a 3-day retreat I made during Lent 1968, I felt his pressing invitation to live in greater intimacy with him. That summer, at a parishrun summer camp, I began to carry out a serious vocational discernment. Luckily suitable accompaniment was provided. Afterward, I returned home and resumed my studies.
When I finished school, I left the clean, pure air of the countryside in order to find a job. I sold periodicals at a newsstand in town so as to continue my education, taking a two-year accelerated course that would enable me to earn my high school diploma.
That diploma was my priority and everything else took second place, including my uncertainty about what I wanted to do with my life. I made new friends, became involved in the local Catholic Action group and even got engaged…. But at a certain point I began to experience once again the interior restlessness and dissatisfaction–the sense of incompleteness–that I had felt before and that no person or thing could satisfy. I became convinced that the Lord was calling me to be a missionary. I talked about it with my spiritual director, who said bluntly: “The missionary life–yes, that is good, but in your own surroundings and near your family. You don’t have to leave your native land to be a missionary.” However, I wasn’t so sure about that. I became more and more certain that I would never be able to devote myself to the domestic life.
The love I felt burning within me could not be limited to a husband and family exclusively. So at the age of 25, after a fierce struggle with myself, I made the decision to give myself to God. It had taken me a long time to reach this point but in compensation I never wavered in the least once my decision was made.
I am very grateful to the Lord for waiting so patiently for me to accept his invitation and even more for his presence in my life. Today I understand more than ever the meaning of the phrase I heard way back at my entrance into the Congregation: the grace of a vocation.
Why did I become a Pauline? Out of an all-consuming passion for communications. At the time when I made my decision to become a religious, I was working as a telephone/telex operator in one of the best hotels in Algarve. I was fascinated by the fact that I could sit in a small room and communicate with the whole world. It was an indescribable emotion–a true passion. I felt as if I had been sent to an immense number of people and that I carried them all within me, and this feeling has never left me.
I entered the Congregation in August 1974 and made the first stage of my formation with two other young women who had entered ahead of me. Because I had been accustomed to an independent lifestyle, it was not easy to learn a new one. A few months later, only two of us candidates were left. I heard the sisters speak about groups of 40, 50, even 80 novices and I was envious because I too wanted to be a part of a large community. After three years of carrying out the propaganda apostolate, my co-novice and I were sent to Brazil and there my dream was realized. For four years, I was part of a large group of FSPs from many different countries: Brazil, Chile, Venezuela and Portugal. The experience surpassed my dreams and even today I remember it vividly.
I returned to Portugal in 1983 and immediately ran into a major problem. I discovered that it was necessary to re-adapt myself, almost begin all over again, above all when it came to my new activity: running the circumscription’s publishing sector.
The Daughters of St. Paul had arrived in Portugal in 1950 and had immediately begun to publish books, some of which were very successful. But they carried out the publishing apostolate sporadically, along with many other apostolic activities, so it moved ahead mainly through the good will of the sisters rather than as a result of apostolic planning. In Brazil, I had been assigned to the publishing department so that I could organize this apostolate in my own circumscription when I returned home.
The period following my re-entry was difficult. I had to take responsibility for projects and contracts; get to know the laws of my country concerning printing and the dissemination of printed material; find authors, translators, collaborators; contact typographies; produce a book catalogue and distribute it…. My “office” was my bedroom, but my dreams went far beyond that small space.
Those dreams finally “flew out my bedroom window” and were realized when a small building on our property consisting of 8 modest rooms was set aside for the publishing apostolate. There was finally enough space for editorial offices, administration work and even a storeroom! At last the sector could expand to welcome its first two collaborators.
That was a beautiful time, characterized by intense passion for the apostolate. Sr. Dulce Tramontina arrived from Brazil to take charge of graphics work and she was soon joined by Sr. Delfina Repetto from Italy. Pauline publishing in Portugal was entering a whole new stage of development, requiring many adaptations. The humble but persevering efforts of our small sector resulted in editions that gained the respect and trust of the public and of local Church officials. As time went by, our publishing projects expanded to include mini-media and a variety of CDs. In planning our initiatives, we allowed ourselves to be guided by the Gospel, the needs of the people and of the Church, and current events, striving to view everything from the pastoral perspective, as our Founder had recommended so strongly.
Over the years, I also carried silently in my heart another dream: to collaborate with our sisters in the missions. I knew for a fact that places we cannot reach personally can be reached through the instruments of communication. My dream was to send books and other material to our sisters in Africa and I never gave up this dream, even though at that time it seemed impossible to realize.
But in 2003, the year in which Fr. Alberione was beatified, this dream too became a reality thanks to the new apostolate building constructed by our circumscription. Today, from this building, we can carry out the Pauline mission not only for the benefit of the people of Portugal but also for the Portuguese speaking countries of Africa.
In 2005 we had the great joy of publishing the African Bible in Portuguese as a joint project with our sisters of Mozambique and Angola. The introductions to the various books of the Bible and the explanatory notes were taken from the edition published by the FSPs of Nairobi, Kenya.
I am very happy with my life. If I were to go back in time, I would repeat everything I’ve done up to now–only I would do it better!
I am profoundly grateful to God, to my family and to the Congregation. We truly have an inexhaustible charism!